Classes are over, and there was only one thing on the mind of every Reedie this weekend: Renn Fayre! This was, I think, closer to Burning Man than to any medieval reenactment (from what I’ve heard of Burning Man, at any rate). There was an amazing amount of energy, debauchery, creativity, intoxication, revelry, and fun.
It all began Friday morning with the last Hum lecture of the year. It was a good lecture about teleology (focus on the end), but with all the freshman, a bunch of upperclassmen, and copious amounts of alcohol present, it quickly became more of a party. Jan loves giving this lecture, however. There’s even a Jan drinking game: every time he touches his hair, take a drink. Suffice to say, I have never seen that many people drunk so early in the day.
After classes I wandered all over campus looking at all the Renn Fayre projects. The theme this year was Peter Pan, so there were all sorts of themed projects: the mailroom was decorated as a lagoon, with fish hanging from the ceiling and inflatable crocodiles; there was a giant crocodile clock tower like the one in the movie Hook; there was a maze and a pirate fort outside of Eliot; the Blue Bridge was turned into a colorful crocodile; there was even a pirate ship hot tub. Other projects included an enormous geodesic dome with a bicycle-powered time machine in it, a “cuddle tent” made of fabric and pillows made to billow out by being built over a hot air vent, putting gels over all the lamps to make them colorful, and hanging ornaments and streamers in the trees.
The big event that really kicks off Renn Fayre is Thesis Parade. All the graduating seniors have (hopefully) finished their theses, and they march triumphantly out of the library and all over campus. Everyone else wears fancy costumes and sprays them with champagne. There was music, dancing, and yes, more alcohol. By the time the seniors marched through Eliot they were transformed into veritable Bacchae! It was quite exciting just to watch, as you might imagine. Trix came up and hugged me and twirled me around, she was so drunk and happy!
Peaches and I worked in the Karma Lounge Friday afternoon. There are two organizations set up to keep Reedies safe during Renn Fayre: Border Patrol keeps non-students and non-guests off campus, and Karma Patrol makes sure students and guests stay hydrated and healthy. Students volunteer for the positions, most of which involve patrolling campus. There is also the Karma Lounge for people who just need to lie down or throw up (White Bird is there for people who need actual medical attention). I spent most of the time filling up jugs of water and sanitizing waste bins, while Peaches helped keep the overly intoxicated and sick Reedies comfortable. He’s a much better people-person than I, so our jobs worked out well. It feels so good to help out, whatever I’m doing!
There was a huge line for burritos that evening, so my dormies and I decided to go eat Thai food instead. Despite being slightly taboo to leave campus during Renn Fayre, we had a good time hanging out and eating good food. A little reprieve from the loud chaos. We were all pretty tired by the end of the day, but we watched a few episodes of Rocky Jones and Flash Gordon before going to bed. “Do you love Pinto Vortando?”
The next morning Kara and I got pancakes and watched Ben play softball before the — Picters! They came yelling from around Steele, a tide of blue bodies, and we dashed straight into the dorms. We were safe! Actually, I think we ran more out of fear of seeing Nick’s naked body than of getting covered in blue paint… From the window we watched them swarm the softball players and then get tagged by the anti-picters, those bold few equipped with red-paint-filled super-soakers (and, thankfully, clothes).
Well, we could run, but we couldn’t hide forever. We went out with Ben, Peaches, and Jessica to watch Jacob and Dan play Full Contact Human Chess. The picters were there, but much calmer. They were no longer actively tackling people they didn’t know. But before we knew it, Nick jumped us from behind and gave us big bear hugs. Ugh. Peaches ran for it, but eventually Nick got the better of him, too. The rest of the morning was spent with my eyes fixed at face level.
We waited in line for an hour or so for the big Renn Fayre Feast. There was a ton of food, and quite good at that. Then we all went to the inflatable pirate ship and bounced around and played like little kids — it was so much fun! Unfortunately, soon after that the weather, which had previously been bright and warm, took a turn for the worse. Kara and I went out to watch the battoujutsu demonstration in the Quad, but we all got completely soaked. The band that was playing was atrocious (how did they think they could sing?), but at least the swording went well considering the poor conditions. Dan especially did some amazing cuts, and Marty sliced through a couple of watermelons. There was even a pretty large enthusiastic audience, albeit they were quite drunk.
Afterwards we took warm showers, put our clothes the dryer, and huddled in the common room to watch movies and warm up. Dan made his killer shortbread and we watched The Birdcage and Mulan. “I see you have a sword. I have one, too. It’s very manly, and tough.” The weather slowly cleared up, and then night fell. I took a nap for an hour before Renn Fayre activities began again.
Glo Opera was, unfortunately, uninspired. There were no seats, so we had to kneel on coats on the wet grass, while surrounded by smoke and drunken people. Between the poor quality of the show and the uncomfortable environment, we decided to move on to the Fire Revelry demonstration. This was a wise move: the fire spinning was truly awesome. There were fire poi, fire staffs, even a fire hool-a-hoop. It was mesmerizing and magical and amazing! Peaches spent the rest of the evening in awe, saying “fire dancing!” every thirty seconds. Almost every photo I took turned out beautifully. Now I want to learn how to do poi this summer (how fitting considering they’re originally Maori) and join the Reed Fire Revelry group next year. Fire dancing!
Sunday morning was lazy. Peaches and I went to breakfast late and joined Ben outside. We lay on the front lawn and talked for a while before the samba band arrived. There was a whole lot of dancing and good music, but Calvin Ball and the shopping-cart chariot racing fell through. Colin Diver won the Faculty Sumo Wrestling, but I think he disappeared before the nearby lube wrestling participants decided it would be more fun with less clothes. Peaches and I shielded our eyes for most of that… Thankfully Dan and Ben decided to try sumo wrestling themselves, putting on the ridiculous stuffed suits and flinging themselves into each other.
Kara, Peaches, and I then helped Ben set up for the rescheduled fireworks display. We outlined the field with caution tape, and chased each other with the stakes (you see, I’m really a half-vampire, and… um… nevermind). The fireworks guy complimented us on how good a job we did! The show itself was one of the best I’ve ever seen. Afterwards we helped direct people away from the Land Bridge to avoid trampling the baby ducks. Everyone had flashlights, KC wielded a bokken decorated with glow-sticks, and I finally found my loud authoritative mode. Duck Protection Squad, go!
By now half my dormies were high on one drug or another, so we made macaroni and cheese and had a mini light-switch rave — I mean, glow-stick rave — in the social room. Everyone was there: Nick, Max, and (other) Dan, Jacob, Jessica, Kara, and Peaches, Ben, KC, and Marty, and even Peaches and Jacob’s friend Gavin. Gavin and Jessica used their mad raver “skillz” to put on a great glow-stick show, and Jacob danced with some on his ankles. Peaches and I had a duel on the porch with PVC candy canes left over from a Renn Fayre project. Some of us sat and chatted, others played video games, and then, at last, when even the upbeat music wasn’t enough to keep me awake, I crawled into bed.
Thus ends the epic saga of my freshman Renn Fayre.
